Androux – Book 1 – Volume 2

Androux And The Intergalactic Space Oyster

Of course the world becoming a literal oyster was unprecedented and humanity would have to adapt; Androux was no exception. Months went by, people were slow to adapt but they did though not without its toll. It was what would formerly have been considered a Tuesday when the creative lightning struck! Androux, after tending to his wounds had figured out that they could utilise this new oyster planet to explore previously unreachable destinations in space. Oysters after all are a fantastic source of propulsion. It would seem the universe was now humanity’s… of course we can’t finish that phrase as the saying was banned following recent events.

Unfortunately, Androux’s dreams of sailing the stars atop a mighty space oyster were not to be. You see, whilst some people liked the idea of the world suddenly turning into a giant oyster, others were not a fan of the plot twist. An online petition had started to revert the world back into its previous state, saying that it had RUINED Androux’s character arc. The founder of the petition, RickandMortyFan69 had this to say: “Androux was such a deep and nuanced character before the meanie writers subverted our expectations with a USLESS plot twist that completely ruined his character arches. Clearly they didn’t know what to do with the character after volume 1 and completely ignored established lore for the sake of shock value! I was completely on board with Androux being a meth-addicted flower-picker with the power to summon Satan, but the world becoming a giant oyster out of NOWHERE is just too unrealistic!” Androux assumed that RickAndMortyFan69 was talking out of his arse, but since his petition got a lot of upvotes on Reddit, this means that everything he is saying was definitely, absolutely 100% true and without fault in the slightest.

Initially Androux felt pretty down about the whole thing; but then he remembered he was Androux! He had shined through in the face of adversity before and he would do it again now! “To hell with the haters” Androux exclaimed as he strapped himself into the saddle atop the Oyster planet. “I will see the stars and so will all of you!”. With that Androux mashed the throttle lever forward and Oyster earth was away. Whilst the resistance RickAndMortyFan69 had built up would seem large from outside observation, it was actually very small and only ever seemed large in the first place due to the fact such people just shout louder. The resistance was quickly rounded up and sentenced to the naughty step by Supreme Commander Androux.

Androux confronted RickAndMortyFan69atop the naughty step; “personally I thought the world becoming a giant oyster was a neat little idea, but that’s just my opinion though” said Androux. “I don’t know” responded RickAndMortyFan69, “what if your opinion is actually bad?” Androux recoiled in horror after being bestowed this new information. RickAndMortyFan69had just made a great point, what if Androux’s opinion WAS actually bad? Androux was restless for days, he just didn’t know how to feel about anything anymore. Unable to make up his own mind about the situation he did the next best thing: read other people’s opinions online and pass them off as his own. During his internet searches he came across RickAndMortyFan69’sYouTube channel. On his channel he had uploaded a video series titled “Why the world becoming an oyster is OBECTIVELY the worst thing ever and made me kill my cat and dog.” This series was 500 parts long and each video had a run time of over 40 hours, which could only be described as “slightly unnecessary”. He began watching the first part of this video series and was shocked at what he saw.

Androux was starting to have a real existential crisis. This RickAndMortyFan69, who initially Androux dismissed as a common internet troll was now showing himself to be of much greater intellect than Androux had anticipated. It was too late for that however; the world was already an Oyster and nothing could be done about that. Androux decided however that he needed someone such as RickAndMortyFan69 as an advisor. Before he could pose the question though a more pressing matter materialised; whilst Androux had been away from the controls nobody else had assumed control. The Oyster planet had pranged Jupiter and the Jupitonians were not happy.

Book 1