My Yu-Gi-Oh! August/September 2023 banlist predictions

6 long months of Kashtira domination – the times when any cards sent to the Graveyard weren’t banished instead feel like a distant memory at this point. I don’t even have the energy to really be mad about it anymore, as the feelings of frustration at Riseheart for banishing all my important one-ofs from my deck has me but a shallow, empty husk. Besides, if I had a penny for every time my opponent had exactly Wraitsoth, Shifter and Pot Of Prosperity in their opening hand, I could probably pay off my student debt.

You know, the vice grip that Kashtira has around the TCG’s balls has me feeling a little apathetic to the state of the game. For example, I’d really like to start playing Purrely soon, but every time I go to pick up the deck, I remember that it’s just another archetype which can’t function properly under Shifter or Ariseheart. And also Droll. Fuck Droll. It’s 2023 and we’re still letting staple cards from about a decade ago single-handedly decide the outcome of every other game.

So, what are my hopes for the next banlist? First of all, I. Want. Kashtira. Dead. Just gut this fucking thing already so we can move on with our lives. Secondly, please axe more bullshit floodgates so we can actually play the fucking game, or at least change the activation requirement for Skill Drain to “your opponent gets to plough your mother”. And last of all, please hire a task force to track down every single Runick card and prepare them for incineration.


Eradicator Epidemic Virus

It’s quite amusing that only now people are just finding out that this card is scummy and horrible. I’ve been advocating for the ban of Eradicator ever since Runick Spright was stacking a fat Gigantic in order to fulfil the activation requirement. Obviously, EEV is at the forefront of everyone’s minds right now because there’s a deck that can actively search it, but you can play this card in fucking EVERYTHING. It turns out that dark monsters with 2500 or more attack includes 90% of all Yu-Gi-Oh! cards ever made.

Gimmick Puppet Nightmare

I know, I know, this is like banning all the tuner monsters to keep Halqifibrax in the game, but Albion the Sanctifire Dragon is far to new a card to receive the guillotine treatment, so Gimmick Puppet Nightmare’s execution will have to suffice. Not that anyone will care much, I don’t think even the 4 or 5 people who play Gimmick Puppets even use this card.

Gigantic Spright

Oh, don’t give me that look, Gigantic Spright is a generic extra deck monster that special summons from the deck, of course it’s gonna get banned eventually! Besides, it’s been an entire year since Power of the Elements came out, are we not sick of this shit yet? Don’t you think that deckbuilding could be a little more interesting rather than every deck capable of putting 2 level 2 monsters on the field becoming another Spright variant? The more I think about it, the more I realise that Gigantic Spright is essentially a slightly less splashable Kinghtmare Mermaid, except you get to play actually good cards. Yes, I am making that comparison. Fuck you.

Phantasmal Lord Ultimitl Bishbaalkin

Oh, how I ummed and erred about whether or not Hot Red Dragon Archfiend King Calamity should be on here, because we apparently need to ban Outer Entity Azathot for about the 15th time already. But, whilst I’m all about banning stupid “I win” floodgates, I thought I’d would be better to axe the card that cheats it out, being of course, Bishbaalkin. You may think that’s kind of backwards, but I imagine Konami will want to milk Calamity in some future strategy, because apparently we’re not allowed to have any fun. With that said, Bishbaalkin is the card of card that only shows up to do some degenerate FTK garbage and literally nothing else, so I doubt anyone will miss it. Ok Distantcoder, you can stop pointing the gun at my head.

Kashtira Ariseheart

It’s bad enough when Konami gives obnoxious walking floodgates to bad decks like Dinomorphia or that Kairyu-Shin thing, but giving them to decks that are actually good? A recipe for disaster. The last 6 months of Yu-Gi-Oh! have revolved around if your deck can play around/answer exactly this one asshole. Ariseheart is like that one guy in your friendship group that no-one really likes, but will always tag along to every single social gathering, being generally annoying and spoiling the overall vibe. He probably also smells like out-of-date dog food, but no-one can be brave enough to tell him to piss off and go away. But I’m telling you to piss off and go away Ariseheart, now get in the fucking bin.


Kashtira Fenrir

If you’ve recently awoken from a cryogenic slumber you entered around the time Burst of Destiny was released, and have therefore never had the displeasure laying eyes on Kashtira Fenrir, allow me to enlighten you: Remember Dinowrestler Pankratops? Well imagine that card, but if had a stronger form of removal. And had even less restrictions so it could also be used going first. And was a ROTA for its entire archetype that could even search another copy of itself. And the archetype that it’s used in is actually good (unlike Dinowrestlers). And you can run it at 3 copies. Hmmm, now I think of it, maybe cryogenic freezing is something I should consider.

Runick Fountain (and maybe Tip as well)

I could blather on and on about how much I despise the Runick cards, so I will; I hate that I inhabit the same mortal coil as someone who thought putting “draw 3 cards” on a field spell was a good idea, I hate that it’s a splashable engine that you can put in fucking everything, and I especially hate how well it synergises with every cancerous stun-tool in the game. I don’t really care what among the Runick cards gets hit, just kill this thing.

Dimension Shifter

Shifter is a prime example of why printing cards that “keep the meta in check” will never, ever work. Why? Because eventually the meta decks will just adopt those same cards to ruin everyone else’s day. For example, I imagine the intended purpose of D-Shifter was for weaker, non-GY focused decks to have a powerful tool to use against stronger decks that did utilize the Graveyard. What’s actually happened, is that D-Shifter has become a tool used by the strongest deck in the game to have free wins against 80% of the opposition. Fun.

Glow-Up Bulb

It’s been almost a year since Crystron Halqifibrax was publicly disembowelled for our enjoyment, but the damage he caused during his lifetime still remains. Free this please.

Orcust Harp Horror (come on already)

Orcust could have fucking Kinghtmare Mermaid back at this point and it would still suck.

Bystial Magnamhut

This is less of a hit to Dragon Link for undergoing it’s 47th format of metagame relevance, but more due to the fact that, in formats where Bystial Magnamhut is good, it single handedly makes 70% of all other decks unplayable garbage. I bet all you Mathmech and Drytron players really enjoyed Darkwing Blast format.

Some more dogshit floodgates please

I would actually like to play the fucking game.

Wind-Up Carrier Zenmaity

Dark World can handloop far more efficiently than this ever could and that’s not even meta, so I don’t think 1 Zenmaity would be a big deal. Besides, this thing could’ve been freed years ago if Wind-Up Hunter would’ve taken its place on the F/L list.

M-X-Saber Invoker

Invoker was recently unbanned in the OCG, to which everyone replied “what?” Maybe this unban will translate over to the TCG, but who knows?

Majestpecter Unicorn – Kirin

In the agonisingly slow procedure of removing all Pendulum cards from the banlist that aren’t exactly Electrumite, I suppose Majestpecter Unicorn – Kirin is next in line. Don’t get me wrong, Krin is a very good card, but powercreep has long since gotten to the point where Kirin would just be “ok” in the modern game. Also Pendulums are rubbish.

One of the other Dragon rulers or something idk

We’ve successfully brought 2 of the Dragon Rulers back without any disastrous ramifications, so we could maybe unban a few more. Which ones? No idea, I can’t be asked to read them right now. I’m only even mentioning D-Rulers in here, because of the ongoing debate about how they could all come back to 3 without issue and I can’t be bothered disagree with that. Thinking independently is hard.


Mind Control

I’ve heard the argument that, if Mind Control were to be at multiple copies, it would be an auto-include in very side deck, but I’m not sure that’s entirely true. Can Mind Control even compete with all the going-second staples that we’ve been playing over the last few years? Are people really gonna play this over cards like Dark Ruler No More, Forbidden Droplet and Evenly Matched? Besides if Konami’s design philosophy continues as it is, these kind of blowout cards are only going to get stronger. I for one eagerly await the release of Dark Ruler No More 2, The Dark Rulering, in a few sets time.

Pot Of Prosperity

They may as well change the card text to “add either any Kashtria card, Evenly Matched or Dark Ruler No-More from your deck to your hand.”

Spellbook Of Judgment

Despite holding a reputation as “a card so powerful that it could never be unbanned” for most of its lifetime, Spellbook Of Judgment has been re-legalised in both the TCG and OCG for about a year now and seen absolutely no competitive play. It turns out going plus 7 in the end phase is meaningless if all the cards you add are bad.

Blaster, Dragon Ruler of Infernos and the other one

Unless Volcanics magically become tier 0 (which would be very funny if it happened), I don’t see Blaster at multiple copies being a big deal. Also there’s apparently another Dragon Ruler that’s still limited, so let’s change that.

Infernity Archfiend and/or Launcher

Are we really worried about Infernity in 2023? What does this deck even do? From what I gather, the best thing Infernity could do, is be a worse version of every other mid-tier combo deck in Yu-Gi-Oh! right now. Incredibly fragile combos that summon some generic boss monsters,backed up by a counter trap? Yeah, I don’t think that’s a big deal nowadays.

Dragonic Diagram

Whilst I am slightly nauseous at the idea of True Draco becoming a tiny bit more playable, Dragonic Diagram is a field spell that’s a ROTA which isn’t as good as the million other field spells that are also ROTAs.

Salamangreat Gazelle

The more time we drift further away from TOSS format, the more I fail to understand why Salamangreat is even a fan favourite deck. Maybe some people’s idea of peak Yu-Gi-Oh! is stalling under Bagooska for a turn, until you can make Update Jammer into Accesscode Talker for game. Or perhaps you looked at Mathmech and thought “hmm, this is very good, but I’d like to win less games.”


Sky Striker Mobilize – Engage!

Since we’re on the subject of TOSS format decks, here’s Sky Striker Mobilize – Engage! Yeah, I know people still have PTSD from the 15 formats of Raye simps winning locals every week, but Sky Striker hasn’t aged as well as you think, particularly as Runick have a field spell that’s both Engage and Multirole condensed into one card. Besides, the best Sky Striker card, Mystic Mine, is thankfully still banned.

Red Rose Dragon

Man, Konami employees would’ve really fed their own grandmothers to lions if it meant avoiding banning Crystron Halqifibrax for another format.

Herald of Orange Light

Why did we limit this thing again? Oh yeah, Tear-Ishizu was a deck that existed.

Denglong, the First of the Yang Zing

Denglong returned to us last banlist, only for it to be basically ok. Besides, I really don’t think there’s a difference between 1 and 3 of this thing.

Morphing Jar

This is still on the limited list to help prevent deckout becoming a viable win-condition, which is understandable – just imagine if there was a deck in the game that could mill half of your deck before you’ve even had a turn? That would be horrible to play against, wouldn’t it?

Sekka’s Light

Isn’t this just a more restrictive and worse version of Pot of Desires?

Mecha Phantom Beast Auroradon

If you’d told me from early-to-mid 2022, that future me was advocating for the release of Mecha Phantom Beast Auroradon, past me would’ve found a way to invent time travel so he could punch future me in the face. But let’s be real, what’s Auroradon doing without consistent access to Deskbot 001, achieved via the use of a certain Link-2 Crystron monster I’m fucking sick of talking about?

There we go, that’s everything! I hope when it comes to writing the follow up to this article, I’m bathing in fresh blood spilled from the mutilated corpse of Kashtira Ariseheart – nothing less will suffice.


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